When all our doubts, fears, and insecurities overwhelm us, we can often find ourselves wishing we were someone else. Often, we think and believe someone else is better and more confident than we are. In reality, many people are even more scared than you are!
You spot someone at a party, casually sipping a drink. You think to yourself, “She looks calm and confident.” But if you could read her mind, you would see clouds of thoughts just like yours. You might be amazed to find her thinking something like, “Are people wondering why I’m sitting here alone? Why don’t guys find me attractive? I wish I was as smart as my best friend…” The list goes on.
We look at a young entrepreneur and wonder, “What else could he ask for?” And yet he stares in the mirror and says, “I hate my big eyes. I wonder why I don’t have more friends. I hope my parent work things out.” And so on.
Isn’t it f funny?
We envy other people for looking perfect, and we wish we could trade places with them. Meanwhile, they look at us and wish the same thing!
We’re insecure regarding others, and they’re insecure regarding us! We suffer from low self-esteem, lack of self-confidence, and lose any hope of self-improvement.
I have a friend who never gets tired of talking. In most conversations, she is the only one who seems to be interested in the things she has to say. As a result, all of our other friends tend to avoid her whenever she’s around, and she doesn’t even notice how bad it’s affecting the people in her environment.
One key to self improvement is to LISTEN and TALK to a trusted friend. Find someone who you find comfort in opening up with even the most gentle topics you want to discuss.
Ask questions like…
- Do you think I am ill-mannered?
- Do I always sound so argumentative?
- Do I talk too loud?
- Does my breath smell?
- Do I ever bore you when were together?
By doing this, the other person will know that you are interested in the process of self improvement. Lend her your ears for comments and criticisms. Open up your mind and heart as well. And in return, you may want to help your friend with constructive criticism that will also help her improve her self.
In order to love others, you must love yourself too. Remember, you cannot give what you do not have!
Stop thinking of yourself as second-rate. Forget the repetitive thoughts. Accepting your true self is the first step to self improvement! We need to stop comparing ourselves to others only to find out at the end that we’ve got 10 more reasons to envy them.
We all have our insecurities. Nobody is perfect. We always wish we had better things, better features, better body parts, etc. But life doesn’t need to be perfect for people to be happy about themselves. Self improvement and loving yourself is not a matter of shouting to the whole world that you are perfect and you are the best. Rather, It’s the virtue of acceptance and contentment. When we begin to improve ourselves, we then begin to feel contented and happy.